Raising Puppies and Babies – Part 2

Editor’s Note: This is the second of a two-part series. Pictures of new puppy Velvet can be found at Melodie Davis’ blog: www.findingharmonyblog.com.

The most obvious similarity is that puppies and babies both have three basic needs: to eat, to eliminate, and be loved.

Maybe you could say I was trying to keep up with my daughters by having a “baby” to hug since my grandsons don’t live nearby! Maybe you could say we were trying to hang on to our youth. Maybe you could say we were senile for thinking we could handle a baby pup.

Last week I wrote about adopting a new puppy, Velvet. We’re still adjusting. This week I’ll explore more about how dealing with a new pup is quite a bit like adapting to a new baby. Of course, a baby is exponentially a much bigger deal than a puppy, and much more precious. No argument.

The most obvious similarity is that puppies and babies both have three basic needs: to eat, to eliminate, and be loved. Sometimes I wished I could just diaper the puppy. I recalled a statement by Dr. Ira Byock, who has written so meaningfully about end-of-life issues in his landmark book Dying Well (Riverhead Books, 1997). We also interviewed him for our TV documentary, Embracing Aging (Mennonite Media, 2007). Dr. Byock stresses that we need to include in our life expectations—the pictures we have of ourselves for the future—the fact that most of us will need help with toileting and feeding when we are elderly, frail, or dying. If that feels too unpleasant, Dr. Byock would say, get over it. That’s life.

Puppies and babies are so cute that of course it helps us get over the unpleasantness of cleaning up messes. The love we have for our frail and elderly parents can help us get over the end-of-life ickiness, too. Plus, the fact that our parents helped us when we were small and helpless is something we need to recall.

Beyond these basics, there are many other ways having a new puppy reminded me of the first weeks and months with a baby. New parents have questions: my daughters would ask me specific questions about what they should do. Should they call the pediatrician at the first sign of a cold, or a temperature? What about projectile vomiting? How could they get the baby to really latch on during nursing? How often did I feed them when they were babies? After 30 years, my memory was a little fuzzy. Of course I had recorded their big “firsts” in their baby books and journals I kept for them, but not when or why I first called a doctor in the middle of the night.

I had questions too about our pup. I combed the Internet, but I also called my daughter, who has a large Lab, regarding how they managed to get their dog into his crate when they went to work. Like me, she said she couldn’t remember specifically anymore. And that dog is only 8!

There is not much discipline necessary in dealing with a baby, but from day one you have to start letting a pup know that outside is where she goes to the bathroom. Which leads to the second part of this issue: a puppy and a baby both need lots of loving praise. When I told a friend at a church work day that we had to hurry home to let the puppy out of her crate, she understood completely, and said, “You want to help her be successful,” she summarized. I like that approach.

On the entertaining side, I had forgotten how much fun a silly puppy could be: the looks of surprise, sadness, or mischief, the mayhem, the exploration of every bug or rodent—and sometimes blade of grass in its path, the roughhousing play with you or another dog. A neighbor dog, Blue, comes over to our house to play, and is very gentle even though she’s bigger and older (but still less than one year old herself). One day Velvet stood at the top of our deck steps looking down at Blue. I thought to myself: oh dear, she’s afraid to go down the steps. About that time Velvet sprang on Blue, and they rolled in a tumble to the ground.

The first week at home, we had Velvet sleep on a pet bed in the garage. At least at first, she was much too timid to do much exploring. But we knew it would be too cold in the garage later this fall and winter so my husband built a nice huge crate of plywood and chicken wire as soon as possible to keep her contained in the basement. When we finally pen her up for the night, the feeling of relaxation reminded me of a similar relief I felt when my little ones finally went to bed at night. Of course babies go through various stages of sleeping through the night—or not—but at least with a puppy, I knew that unless she really howled, she was down for the count. Done. Using a special toy with a treat inside has helped coax her into the crate. Eventually we plan to leave her loose in the house by day or night: a guard dog has to earn her keep.

When I hand her a small doggy treat—or pick some up at the pet store bins so enticingly placed right before you check out, I remember feeding snacks to the children to hold them over until dinner. I also recall how hard it was to not succumb to their pleas for treats as we walked through the grocery!

Babies and pups? If you’ve raised both, what would you say is similar, or different? They are all God’s creatures with “a place in the choir.”

For a free book from my parenting years, write for Working, Mothering and Other “Minor” Dilemmas. Send to Another Way, 1251 Virginia Ave., Harrisonburg, VA 22802 or.

Posted 11/13/2014 7:00:00 AM

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